This morning I had a BaconEggandCheese sandwich. This is not usual.
What is unusual is that this BaconEggandCheese was made for me. By a friend. By a vegetarian friend.
What? What's that? Vegetarian?! How can that be?
I know... I know... you didn't expect this. Neither did I, honestly, but it's true. I actually do have a handful of friends who restrict their food intake without being forced to by allergies.
I may not understand their lifestyle, choose it for myself, or even attend their parades, but after months of personal struggle, I've taken a very live and let live perspective.
You do you, so to speak.
So when my dear friend Kira presented me with facon (pronounced FAKE-en), I determined to give it a good college try.
Then I remembered that a literal college try would mean that I would show up hungover, five minutes into the facon enjoyment, completely unprepared to eat. I'd take a half-assed bite and immediately begin complaining about the next night's homework... that I have absolutely no intention of completing.
Sorry... I'm not talking about facon anymore. I'll get back to it.
This sandwich (facon and all) was the bomb. Kira cooked up the egg with a bit of heavy cream (uh... omg, yes) and then layered that with facon and a deli-thin slice of pepper jack havarti between two slices of toasted challah. Toss some fresh strawberries on the plate for color and fruitiness... and I'm starting to understand how one could survive breakfast as a vegetarian.
Lila was similarly impressed with the dish and expressed as much by planting her head on my leg for a large part of the meal.
Just in cases.
As it turns out, Lila was out of luck.
In her defense, she has not read my post in praise of the BaconEggandCheese.
So what's the verdict on the facon?
Well... despite the fact that I lolled at its striking resemblance to rolled fondant, it actually is quite tasty. Made most of egg whites, soybean oil, and more flavorings than any one food stuff should have, facon tastes a lot like actual bacon. Smokey, delicious, but with 44% less fat. I won't be replacing the real stuff any time soon, but I might just keep facon in my mental file for a bit.