Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Queer Query: E's Root

So... I may have mentioned my boyfriend. Maybe. Once. Or something.

Whatever, she's fun.

Anyway... E is guest blogging tonight about her root. So... without further ado... I'll let her get to it.


My Root


As you can see, I was clearly born this way, so it’s hard to point out one early root to my extreme gayness. There were a few clues, however, such as the ways I related to popular Nickelodeon shows, including but not limited to:

• Hey Dude and Salute Your Shorts: Both shows featured tough lady characters with gender neutral names: Brad, Venus, etc., and involved cowboy garb and cargo shorts.

• Clarissa Explains It All: I desperately wanted to be Clarissa’s neighbor friend Sam. I wanted his haircut, and I wanted his flannel. Most of all, I wanted his constant access to a pretty lady’s bedroom.

• All That: As many of our people do, I’ve always appreciated a variety show. In true lesbian fashion, my favorite sketch featured the deadpan Lori Beth Denberg offering sarcastic Vital Information (For Your Everyday Life). Early love of snarky women…check.

• Doug: I still dream of a closet in which I have 20 sets of exactly the same outfit.

• Nick News: This show helped spark my adult love of current events, and Linda Ellerbee is one bossy bitch. Her wide-shouldered blazers had an early impact on my sense of fashion.

5 comments:

timidvenus said...

Love it! Love you!

bee listy said...

AMAZING

buzzcutsandbustiers said...

Man, Nick was just the best. And Snick? Snick was the highlight of my week. Don't forget Are You Afraid of the Dark? - plenty of flannel, gender neutral names, and pretty girls to protect from evil creatures.

Amanda said...

Legends of the Hidden Temple. Where two girl teams wore the same things the boys did and beat them handily with their speed and agility.

E said...

Legends of the Hidden Temple was the BEST. I knew I loved you for a reason.